Empowering Teenage Girls For Life's Moments
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Empowering Teenage Girls For Life's Moments

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Dec, 2015

Don’t let sex screw you

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Sex and high school go hand in hand. You’re either thinking about it, having it, not having it, or talking about it. It really can, well for lack of a better word, screw you… pun intended. At this age, with your hormones raging out of control and realizing that the boys in your class have never looked so good, it’s really hard to think about anything else. I’m not saying that all teens are crazy horn-balls- despite what my parents believe. There just seems to be an unspoken (or even sometimes spoken) law that everything must be about sex…

Highschool and Sex

 

And by sex I don’t always mean the sweaty, slightly awkward, sneaky-late-night-in-your-car, relationship defining, face blushing, taboo, full on *gasp*intercourse. Ew. Did I really just say that? I sound like my middle school health teacher who was actually the gym teacher and always insisted on looking you straight in the eyes as he said the word.

By sex I mean:

Seeing a gorgeous boy at the mall and feeling an overwhelming desire to just run up to him and kiss him so hard that he forgets his own name.

Spending an extra 20 dollars on that bra that makes your boobs look that much bigger in order to get the attention of the sexy bad boy in English class.

Extremely over exaggerate your stretching poses so your butt looks extra good in your yoga pants when the hot guy you’ve had your eye on walks into the gym.

Sending a text that says can’t wait to see you later 😉 to a boy who you actually CAN’T wait to see later.

…You get the idea.

 

Sex isn’t just the act. It can be the leading up to it (remember the middle school terminology of 1st base, 2nd base, 3rd base, and home run?). It really can be anything at all relating to the opposite sex. All I know is that when I was 14… I had a full fledged case of the Boy Crazy Flu.

So now that we have all admitted that we are actually sex addicts -okay not really, but definitely preoccupied with the idea- we have to keep in mind what our values are and not let them get thrown away just because our bodies are begging for otherwise.

I realize that in high school there is a ton of pressure to have sex. It always surprised me how quickly our lunch time conversations could so easily turn into a rundown of everyone’s most recent sexcapade. When we talk of it so freely it is easy to forget our own morals and values and take on the values of those around us.

sex rule

So whether you have pledged abstinence until marriage, are waiting to be in love, live by a 5-date rule, or simply just require respect and honesty, ALWAYS remember why you created your “sex rule” in the first place.

I can’t tell you how easy it is to dismiss your morals in the heat of the moment. Our brains turn off when our bodies turn on. But if you remind yourself why (and you have a better reason than “my parents want me to wait” because it’s your body, not your parents’ and as much as you should always remember that they know what’s best for you, this reason alone will not be enough to put on the brakes and wait for when you have made a calculated and well thought out decision to have sex) you will always walk away feeling stronger and not experience the dreaded feeling of “being a prude”.

Sex is a worn out topic, i’ll admit that much to you. However, I feel as though people (mainly adults) spend SO much time repeating “don’t have sex” “wait until marriage” that it is becoming that much easier to just ignore them and spread ’em (too graphic? Sorry). The decision to have or not have sex is yours, but you’ll never be happy with the decision- and unfortunately may even regret the decision- if you don’t know why you are in fact making that decision.

So just give it some thought; you may be surprised what you discover about yourself.